so your joking aggressions are just that, jokes? so you never get angry at anyone? and if you do, you will express that anger just how you feel it? i mean this is how, sometimes, we wrap disappointed and such feelings around in nicer packages like jokes or sarcasm! i don't believe you when you say you're not really being serious and you shouldnt bother!

i mean also, suppose you're angry at someone or you don't like what they did. how will you tell them? i also dont think you will tell them directly. it appears to me that: you will not do anything! you will just be angry so that your anger will stay repressed and transform into something else. you dont really hate people, but you still reject them! so what did you do with dominik? youre disappointed he wont chill with us, you feel betrayed, you feel real anger. and when he's around, you formulate that with sarcasm but how is he gonna know!

how am i gonna know? when i will maybe become more distant? you will tell me its alright but inside its not and then you judge me. why wont you let me do what i think is right for me? why wont you let dominik do what he thinks is right for him? you dont own him – and you dont need him.

now im not angry with you. and i should not be disappointed with you. you have your reasons to behave like this. but maybe i dont care. i feel like i have to care. i want to care if i genuinely feel it. you want me to care genuinely and not because i have to. and maybe, right now, i dont have the energy to sympathise. maybe not. i dont want to be nice always. i dont want to be perfect always. because im not and it makes

now i dont care about this topic so much anymore. its words. it's ego games.