i can't stand it for any minute longer! what good are those fears if they do nothing but keep you back, in your little fucking safety net where its warm and comfortable when it's boring and depressing! no, not just that, it would be a disgrace to waste your life like that! thats not what its supposed to be you have to take the risks and see what is behind! you have to feel the emotions, taste the danger, lick the freedom and be there for once in your life! and i mean be really and wholeheartedly there, with all your soul and everything you have which is just yourself and the universe

it doesnt mean anything anyways! i want to tear apart this thick coat of safety, i want to lay it off but i dont know how! i fear that ive been waiting too long, i dont know how to live anymore. i dont know how to speak anymore. i have no friends and i feel ugly and stupid, how will anyone like me like this? how will i ever like myself like this? i just want to experience something, i have to